Fear of mediocrity

Last year i had posted about Google's Topcoder competition...
this post is dedicated to the same thing.

I kindda thot it wud be good to give my best shot to this contest again... but somehow it gives me more creeps than my regular exams (i didn't get scared even when i was coming here at Syracuse...)

So i started coding right away at 12:00 EDT... and everything started falling apart. I opted for Java instead of my favorite C/C++ cuz had kindda lost touch with them (had been doing J2EE for the last 6 months... followed by a brief period of programming on C/D on Solaris)...
To start with the app hanged... the browser closed itself... i fired firefox... and started coding again... i was longing for eclipse... I wanted my programs to auto complete.. now u wud ask why???? Because I DID NOT KNOW THE METHODS OF SOME CLASSES...
so i fired javaalmanac.com and started lookin out and coding the 250 pointer (the easiest one)...
but alas in the confusion I lost track of time and i pressed the submit button after my time got expired. I did not even look at the 750 pointer.

I hate my self for the mess.... i hate not succeeding at something i know i am good at.... my performance shook my soul... If there is anything i fear in this world apart from God... it is mediocrity, of losing out...
I HEREBY RESOLVE TO SHOW MY METTLE IN THE NEXT TOPCODER.... HERE I COME GOOGLE ....YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!